So What?!

'So what?' One of the most powerful questions available

This tiny little question has to be one of the most powerful questions available. Just two little words. So. What. So what? So what’s the big deal about, ‘So what’?

It’s not just that the question is punchy and to the point with a hint of badass attitude that, quite frankly, can be helpful in situations where we feel anxious or confused or hopeless. ‘So what?’ is so powerful because it’s a beautifully focused question. What these two little words invite us to do is cut to the chase. The question takes us, in an instant, to the heart of the matter. Of what matters most, right here, right now.

‘So what?’ is another way of asking, ‘What’s at stake here?’ or ‘What’s our key concern?’ It takes us out of the ‘noise’ or ‘messiness’ that usually accompanies a strong emotional response by getting us to identify what’s underneath it all. By identifying exactly what it is we’re most concerned about, we take ourselves out of a place where our stories have us to one where we have them. This question allows us to stop, hold our issue up to the light, turn it around, and properly examine what’s going on for us.

If we can get to the heart of the matter by answering, ‘So what?’, then we can move to a place where we can consider whether it’s valid to feel the way we do. We might realise, once we are able to see what’s at stake, that our concern is unfounded. Or, we might realise that it is completely justified. Either way, by clarifying just what it is that’s bothering us, we put ourselves in the best possible position to explore ways of resolving it.

‘So what?’ is so great because if we don’t really know what it is that’s bothering us in the first place, then it’s much more difficult to take care of it. If we can’t identify the core issue, we will most likely remain trapped in a swirl of highly-charged stories and emotions. Although it can sometimes feel good to vent, this is ultimately an unproductive place to be in. ‘So what?’ propels us out of a space of stories and overwhelming emotion. It forces us to focus and stop going around in aimless circles.

‘So what?’ is a handy, pocket-sized question that’s easy to carry around with you. I invite you to try it out for yourself. Next time you feel a strong surge of indignation, worry, fear or resentment overtaking you, pause and ask yourself, ‘So what?’. See what happens. You might be very surprised by the punch this tiny question packs!