What is Life Coaching?
Updated June 2026
Updated June 2026
What is Life Coaching?
Let me start with a confession: coaching is one of those things that's genuinely hard to describe to someone who's never experienced it. It's a bit like trying to describe the taste of Greek yogurt soft serve with melted pistachio chocolate and kadaifi to someone who's never tried it. The best way to understand it is to experience it — but since you're here, let me do my best.
So What Is Life Coaching, Actually?
Life coaching is a one-on-one, collaborative process in which a trained professional works with you to help you achieve something that matters to you — personally, professionally, or both.
That something might be gaining more confidence, communicating more effectively, navigating a difficult transition, managing anxiety, improving relationships, changing direction in your career, or simply developing a clearer sense of what you want and how to get there.
What all coaching clients have in common is a desire for something to be different — and a willingness to do something about it.
Why a Coach and Not Just a Good Friend?
It's a fair question. If you have a wise, perceptive friend who's a great listener, why would you pay a coach?
The honest answer is that a professional coach has been specifically trained to use particular methodologies to help you access your own thinking in ways that don't happen in ordinary conversation — even with the most supportive friend. A good coach will skilfully guide a conversation so that you have your best thinking, draw your own conclusions and figure out your own way forward.
They also bring something your friend can't: impartiality. A coach isn't invested in a particular outcome for you. Their only agenda is yours.
A Brief History
The word "coach" first appeared in around 1830 at Oxford University — slang for a tutor who "carried" a student through an exam. The metaphor stuck: coaching as a process that transports people from where they are to where they want to be.
Life coaching as we know it today emerged in the 1980s, when an American financial planner called Thomas Leonard noticed that his clients wanted more than investment advice — they wanted help organising their lives and achieving their goals. He began developing what he called "life-planning", which eventually became the coaching methodology we recognise today.
Since then, coaching has been shaped by adult education, humanistic psychology, leadership studies and personal development — and has grown into a serious, internationally regulated profession.
Can Anyone Call Themselves a Coach?
Unfortunately, yes — and this is one of the most important things to know when choosing a coach. The industry is relatively young and still largely unregulated, which means that technically anyone can hang out a coaching shingle, regardless of their training or experience.
This is why credentialling bodies like the International Coaching Federation (ICF) play such a crucial role. A coach who holds an ICF credential — or one from a comparable body like the EMCC or COMENSA in South Africa — has met independently verified standards of training, competency and ethics.
I've written more about this in How to Choose a Coach You Can Trust — worth reading if you're in the process of finding a coach.
Different Approaches to Coaching
Just as there are many schools of psychology, there are many models of coaching — each with its own methodology and philosophy. A few examples:
Narrative Coaching
Integral Coaching
Cognitive Behavioural Coaching
Positive Psychology Coaching
Solution-Focused Coaching
Some coaches work exclusively within one model; others draw on several. My own approach is grounded in ontological coaching — a rigorous, evidence-based methodology that works with the whole person: your language, your emotions and your physicality. These three dimensions are deeply interconnected, and shifting any one of them can shift all of them.
What Life Coaching Is
Whatever model a coach uses, good coaching will always:
Create a safe, non-judgmental space for you to think, reflect and explore
Start from where you are — not where someone else thinks you should be
Be genuinely curious about what matters to you and what's getting in the way
Ask questions that open up new thinking rather than giving advice
Support you to find your own answers and your own way forward
Focus on the future — what you want, what's possible, what's next
Produce results that are lasting and that you can sustain on your own
What Life Coaching Is Not
It's not therapy. Coaching doesn't work with the past in the way therapy does. It works with the present and the future — starting from where you are and focusing on where you want to go. Some people see both a coach and a therapist simultaneously, and that's perfectly fine.
It's not mentoring or consulting. A coach won't tell you what to do or share what worked for them. Coaching is about empowering you to find your own path — not following someone else's.
It's not advice-giving. A good coach trusts that you are the expert on your own life. Their job is to ask the questions that help you access that expertise — not to hand you a to-do list.
It's not just listening. A coach will give you space to think and express yourself — but they'll also challenge you, stretch you and redirect you when the conversation loses focus. It's a purposeful, structured process, not a vent session.
Is Life Coaching Right for You?
Coaching works best for people who are genuinely open to seeing things differently — and willing to experiment and practice between sessions. You don't need to have everything figured out before you start. In fact, uncertainty and confusion are often the best starting points.
If you're curious about what coaching could offer you, the best thing to do is have a conversation.
You might also find these useful:
How Can Coaching Help You? What to Expect and Whether It's Right for You
How to Choose a Coach You Can Trust
I hope this gives you a clearer picture of what life coaching is — and whether it might be right for you. If you'd like to experience what coaching actually feels like, the best place to start is a complimentary chemistry session. No pressure, no commitment — just a conversation.
Find out more about life coaching here or get in touch to book your complimentary chemistry session.